Moving On

How to let go of what I have not attained

When all I wish is that today was yesterday

When to move forward means to leave behind

When waiting till I’m ready is waiting till I die

Trying to pretend that the person I am today

Is the person I want to be

For what scares me too much

Is the thought of just being me

I’m not sure what I’m hiding from

Even if I can’t accept it I know what I need to do

But when you’re fighting yourself

There’s no escaping you

I don’t want to say goodbye to the people I knew

If only they would come with me too

For without them I don’t know what to do

But then is that really moving on

If I take everything with me

Then nothing has changed,

My life is still stuck in the same old place

But then there’s the question – do I really want to move on?

For I know it will be difficult, hardship and pain

But I know if I lose everything I’ll have everything to gain

Then why is it so hard just to let go of it all

Because when your not holding on your more likely to fall

Perhaps I was never meant to be like that person

It’s like starting to run when you’ve already lost the race

I’m competing for something I fear I will never win

So I’ve lost all hope to even begin

But yet inside of me is that 5 year old child

Who dreams to cross the finish line

But I refuse to let her speak to me

For I don’t know who she is you see

Like a lost part of me, who desires for more

More than a life forgotten in years

More than a series of laughter and tears

More than just a pointless usage of time and space

Don’t you remember when you were young

And you wanted to change everything

And the solutions were so simple and you were so brave

And life was so easy for you knew the way

And when your heart made a conviction

You stood against the world

You couldn’t read a book

But killed giants with your words

Oh what would she say if she saw you now?

Her lips tight and a baby frown

And more importantly what would you say

You forgot your conviction every moment of the day

Don’t you owe it to the person that you once were?

To accept what you always knew was true

And I mean really accept it as the truth

So much so that it becomes the only guide for you

And to change the world like you always knew you could

Starting one heart at a time, with the most corrupt which is mine

Grab a shovel and remove the dirt

A lifetime of sins it’s going to hurt

If life is a game then you’re already in it

You’ve rolled the dice you have to move

Scared to climb a ladder, then get eaten by a snake

Even if you close your eyes you’re still awake

You can stand still and pretend that everything is the same

But the earth will still rotate, and the seasons will change

If you don’t decide who you’re going to be

Then your past will never set you free